BD and I are arguing!
Now, this itself is not an uncommon occurrence in our household..I must clarify that I am not talking about ‘plate smashing’ physical or ‘serious’ relationship ending arguments here..more of the niggly, living together on a daily basis, simmering kind..you know what I mean..he drops his clothes on the floor for the 50th time in a row, and instead of me picking them up and putting them away..I snap and scream about ‘teenage behavior’ or I wonder out loud , in an irritated tone how the heck we are supposed to teach good manners and respect to our 3 year old, if Daddy still hasn’t learnt at 32! This outburst generally makes him snap back some remark about ‘crazy womans ( or most recently pregnancy) hormones’..which only serves to enrage me further. After a little ‘silent period’ he accepts he is wrong and I am right…and then for at least 2 -3 days the clothes make it to the washing hamper or closet, before the cycle starts once more.
This argument is different, you see he is calling into question my mothering, or more to the point, my baby ‘hosting’ skills…we are arguing about DRINKING WHILE PREGNANT…..what is there to argue about I hear you shout…well let me tell you.
I am from Europe, specifically the UK and things over the pond are different to here in lots of ways ….I was under the impression that I would not experience much of a culture shock moving from England to Canada..but I was wrong…and in fact the longer I am here, the more differences I notice. The most obvious example would be language..i don’t know what Canadians speak but a lot of the time it isn’t English as I know it! Take the word FANNY..in Canada & the US this means bum, backside or arse, and I’m told it is quite a nice, cute term..but not in the UK..where fanny is actually slang for a womans V-Jay-Jay( thanks Oprah for that term..love it!)
..so when people are talking about ‘fanny packs’ or ‘perky fannies’ I start sniggering like a 12 year old!
So, anyway, back on subject …in Europe women who are pregnant DRINK! ! Yes, that’s right, they do it at home and in restaurants…and NO ONE bats an eye….do you know why? I’ll tell you..they do not get drunk, in fact they don’t really DRINK ..they just have A DRINK.. and this is the point I am trying to make to BD!
What makes this ‘argument’ even more annoying, is that I had the occasional drink when I was pregnant in the UK with my 3 year old son..and BD didn’t even comment on it, in fact he would pour me a glass of red wine in a restaurant without me even asking him too…JUST 1 though..no more. My friends didn’t act shocked or disgusted, and I never had more than 1 glass of wine or a Guinness ( full of IRON..which is GREAT for pregnant woman) in a day, and no more than 3 units a week..which is considered the safe standard in the UK by the Government.
But here the ‘social stigma’ seems to be different..it is almost implied that 1 glass of wine will disfigure the fetus for life….will cause unknown complications and low birth weight, fetal alcohol syndrome etc..etc....…Radio and TV ads say ” NO AMOUNT OF ALCOHOL IS SAFE WHILE PREGNANT” ….I am sorry but that is just WRONG!
I love a glass of red wine with dinner.. and it’s not hurting me, OR my precious cargo inside of me. In fact red wine has MANY health benefits..for the cardiovascular system, for the brain ( it has found to be a factor in preventing Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s and other brain conditions) , it has tumor fighting properties for some cancers, can de-stress and relax you..and is packed full of flavanoids ( antioxidants) ..it is now accepted that the FRENCH have been right all along ( this does not happen very often) .. 1 glass RED wine is a fantastic addition to a healthy lifestyle! I REST MY CASE!
I am not saying that drinking alcohol while pregnant should be promoted, as clearly a bottle of wine or 10 Vodkas is not something that any mother should drink, as it is clearly a bad choice for her..and her baby…but it should not be said that a tiny amount of alcohol, for relaxing and enjoying with food is going to do anything to harm babies..as there is absolutely NO evidence that shows this.. in fact a recent European study , actually says a small glass of red wine every day is a BENEFIT to mother and Baby..so there, I say let your common sense prevail..I am already struggling to get off to sleep on a night at 16 weeks pregnant, in 4 weeks or so I will have not 1 but 2 babies kicking me , and my ever growing bump will make it even harder to settle..if a small glass of wine helps..you bet I will be having one! Rather that then Nytols or hot baths!
There are so many things that are worse to have in pregnancy than the occasional drink…Coffee is FULL of toxins ( de-caf even more so if you can believe it) , Tea ..not as much but still not good, sugary pop is bad full stop.. gassy ( if you are pregnant you do not need anything to increase GAS let me tell you) and bad for already sensitive gums, Tuna fish is full of mercury …hell, even fresh air is bad due to traffic pollution these days! If we have muscle pain we can’t go in the Sauna, if we have a headache we can’t take an aspirin…and when driving around in our cars there are lunatics on the roads every day going to fast, or not watching where they are going..It’s a jungle out there!
I don’t know if BD and I will come to an agreement on this subject, but I keep emailing him arguments, studies and articles backing up my position, and he hasn’t said anything for a while..perhaps I should strike a deal with him..If I can’t have 1 more drink while I am pregnant..neither can he!! I am sure given that option, he will be offering me a glass by dinner time tonight!
Anyhow, I will be interested to hear what my friends and others think on this subject.
Returning to other news, Dr M’s office called to say my 1st scan appointment at the hospital will be on Wed June 6th , I have to drink 4 x 8oz glasses of water , so I have a full bladder for a better picture…this makes my legs cross just thinking about it..as it is, I just have to look at water and I need the bathroom…the thought of having 4 glasses then someone bouncing up and down on my full bladder for 30mins with a scanner makes me feel positively ill! Oh well, I just hope that that will be the day they find a membrane..and I can stop dwelling on what may happen…….
Till next time…